Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize