as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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