they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
