She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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