I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Randomize
