Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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