There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
