Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
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