Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
