Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
