Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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