i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize