Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
