The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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