Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
