hell yes lets make some ravioli
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
