Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
