I met the friendliest cop last night
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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