i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
NoShamevember. You game?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
