It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
