u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
