Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
it glows. i had to have it.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
