Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize