i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
