Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
