Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Terrible idea I love it
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
