i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize