piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
