Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize