I must be too annoying 4 u.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
