I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Your cock deserves a montage
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
