I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize