We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
