I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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