Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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