I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
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