I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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