whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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