yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
