Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
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