make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Randomize
