Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad

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(213): View more from California

How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.

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(631): View more from New York

She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.

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(210): View more from Texas

Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.

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(352): View more from Florida

Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it

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(714): View more from California

She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.

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(831): View more from California

to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal

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(480): View more from Arizona

Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.

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(949): View more from California

I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious

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