its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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