I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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