I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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