I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
