Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
