So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
