i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
