well I can't set my house on fire every night
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
