I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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